Somehow the school gives me this really unfamiliar feeling. Because all the feelings in my life in VJ are practically lost. I can't feel them anymore. But as I stopped running around desperately scrambling to look for teachers & started to settle down outside the choir room with Wanping, it started to get incredibly nostalgic. "It's only this part of the school I feel attached to", and that startled me for a moment. This part of the school definitely gave me memories which I never want to re-visit in a long time to come. But these memories are, honestly the best you can ever ask for. At the same time, this part of the school was the place where my life in VJ started, dating right back to December 2006. We caught up & almost immediately, we filled each other with thoughts we dug out deep in our minds. ____________________________________
I moved on, & I walked through the sea of yellow shirts, looking at all the unfamiliar faces staring back at me. Another half of my mind was busy recalling the exact same time which took place exactly a year ago, though. It was full of familiar faces, and I knew I was at a place where I really belonged. Acquaintances whom I felt so comfortable saying hi to, people I see whom I would wave frantically at and friends I felt I could really trust. I would be busy running back and forth from the parade square to the choir room, seeing many of our lovely year 1s enjoying the choir's favourite past time - ponning orientation. Back then, the atmosphere was fantastic. Cheers everywhere, people everywhere, & the vj spirit everywhere.
I continued moving on. Jialing & I went up to the treehouse, which I haven't been to for a year already. I vaguely remember the last time was with Liying, during a morning break. That was an emo day. But well today was one too. "Your face is the only familiar one which makes me feel like I really belonged here". It was lovely talking to her, talking about the present, recalling the past.
I carried on and met Liying towards the end of the orientation for the day. Watching the bball trials was new. Seeing my juniors try out & seeing cedarians in vj culture was good. I felt like I wasn't alone. Watching year1s whom I know from caroling last year was good too. Seeing them enjoying themselves & having fun, reminding myself of how excited I was when I was a little year1 back then. When orientation ended for the day we would rush and meet each other at the front of the hall, and be so excited about going out for dinner. And yes, I saw the exact same thing happening today.
O1 2007 was good. I remember seeing Haiwei a few days back. And the whole orientation thing came gushing back. We spoke & we knew what we were thinking about. We were just in the same OG as freshmen yesterday, and today we've completed our A levels walking down different paths, all ready for the next phase of our lives.
My walk down memory lane ended at Parkway with Liying. It felt as though we just ended school & finished dinner, and we were all ready to go home and prepare ourselves for school the next day. But nope, here I am on 4th Feb 2009, getting ready to sleep soon & continue seeing Blues and Greys tomorrow.
Then the excitement dies down. That was it, trying to become a Victorian for one last day, immersing myself in the "intense" school cheers & trying to replay a scene which took place a year ago, at the exact same place. Looking around in the choir room, replaying as many scenes I could in just a few seconds. Sitting outside the choir room, playing songs on the guitar and seeing xianyong, cc, and random people running about rushing for lessons. Looking at the PT, recalling every scene which took place on the night of Music Fest. A few tears trickled down, which told me it's time to move on. There were 2 years for you to feel VJ, just like everyone else. And your time's over; time for new people to fill the spaces. Time for them to leave their marks, create those memories, and time for you to keep yours safe and sound.
Just occasionally, once in a while, take it out, know that your 2 years was worth every single moment, and smile.
It's truely one of the most memorable places, ever.
"Look into my eye, and I'll tell you. How much I hate chew." Hahaha, this lovely girl who has hawker centre lunch with me every single day. Stop saying words out aloud from my heart. :D
11 days more, and you'll be one step closer to your dream; 11 days more, and we'll be a mile further away from you.