19, the mess.












Thursday, January 1

2008 was a really craaazy year.

I started off the year knowing that there was so much in store for myself. All the activites, like Orientation, Music Fest, SOV, Wales, and of course, THE A levels.

That feeling at the start of the year was amazing. It was all exciting. And it was the first time I felt like that. It was really different from Year1. Haha, I don't think I'd be able to experience such excitement in my life anymore. Cos I guess that's what you can find at VJ only. (:

Well. There was o1. Osiris. Thankyou, my dearest OGLs, for the best times ever. These people are the most amazing group of people who clicked with each other so well in a matter of weeks. We were ALL high on oxygen (: Thankyou for being part of my 2008.

There was Music Fest. I had a great time with October's Loss. That was when we discovered classroom broomstick singers could actually make a dream come true - to get 1st for Vocal Group cat (: LOL. I love you guys so much. I swear we're amazing. How we manage to come up with really good arrangement for songs, how we just make things fall into place really easily, and well, how you guys are really really understanding and forgiving. I'm sorry for giving you all so much trouble, but really, I don't regret my decision at all. Thanks for everything.

And then there was Paper Pavement. Which evolved from 6 sig fig. Well well. This band means alot to me. And the people in it, too. We went through alot. Jamming like crazy, coming up with the craziest ideas, having so much fun, and having to make really hard decisions, and even tearing here and there. All for one, one for all. (: But thank you for these memories and this wonderful experience. It was you guys who taught me what band spirit's all about. And what being there for each other is all about. I'm glad to have jammed with you guys, and to have known you guys. Thank you. (:

My classmates. Haha it was a craaaazy 2nd year with you guys. I'm glad I got to know you guys so much better. All the outings, lunch at Aston, breaks at the canteen, studying together, celebrating birthdays together, and having so much fun in class together standing up together during Mr Foo's classes. Hahahahah. I miss all those, really. Thank you for being such wonderful classmates.

My choir mates. It's been two years, and we've really gone through so much. Thank you my altos, who stayed through everything with me & fought this battle together with me. Thanks for being such great section-mates. And the rest of the people. SOV was a blast. Wales was really good. Practices were really bad BUT I MISS THEM BADLY. hahahah. Seriously, although practices were hard and very tiring, thanks, for going through everything with me & working so hard to make things happen. I'm sure we've all learnt ALOT from the Wales trip. Like what Mr Kwei said. (: I hope we all learnt & grew. & continue to love singing. (:

And. There was you.
Knowing that there would be someone, no matter how difficult, no matter how bad things are, walking down this road with me, was great. And yep, for the entire year, this person made all my dreams come true. And gave me more that I could have ever, ever asked for.

Of course. Good things don't last forever.
No matter how high a squirrel jumps, it ould eventually reach the ground again.
Hahahahahaha. Okay yes i mean it.
Life is just like that.

I think I learnt a lot, and I grew a lot this year.
I learnt how to have faith in things. & I learnt how to believe in things.
Well I can't say I know entirely how to go about doing it cos it really isn't easy.
But at least I tried. And I've seen what it could bring me.
And well, especially towards the end of the year, I experienced more emotions than I ever did. Everything churned together, in a mess. I had a hard time sorting out my thoughts, and I'm still having a really bad time.

But since it's the new year, and I've grown a year older again, I've decided it's time to stop being a little girl. It's gonna be really tough, and even if I'm going to do this alone, I have to do it. There is simply no other way. Oh boy I am saying it and meaning it another way. THIS IS KILLING ME but yeah I still have to do it. I never thought this day would come.

Haha I guess people do grow up. & as we experience different things, we change. I guess I have changed too. And although I have learnt to believe, I guess after this whole experience is over, I will not, believe that easily anymore. No more putting my heart and soul into it, cos I don't wanna see those emotions coming my way anymore.

I thought things were going to be different. But looks like I'm back at square one.
I am really in a state of confusion. And that's 2009 for me.
So tell me, where do miracles come from?

This world is really bleak. But you make the most out of it, and that's where the joy comes from. :)

New year resolutions.
to be the person I really am, & bring joy to people's lives.
& of course to spend more time with my family.

Anyhow, hope it'd be a happy 2009 for you guys.

Now I've got some adjusting to do. & I can only wish for thi
ngs I can only dream of.
Somehow as the years go by, you realise wishes really don't come true.
Cos you'd finally wake up one day.

I just knew it was a dream.
Goodnight world.

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