19, the mess.












Sunday, June 4

is it really meant to end this way?
can you please let me have my way for a little while? i want you to hear me.
i want you to tell me all about those days. what exactly was going on?
i want you to talk to me. will you stop being so silent? it's unbearable sometimes. how things changed all of a sudden at that point of time, god knows what happened. you left me baffled, struck with this enigma. how could you? it's scary you know. i need someone like you. i need one more moment with you. hey i thought i would forget you but it completely doesnt seem so, you havent seemed to have vanished. you left traces here, so, what now?
but still, i know you won't be able to hear me. i guess it's another 6 more months. but time won't wait i suppose? but why? so many years and nothing, nothing at all dawned on me. how i wish you were here, right here.
how on earth would i know that things would change so much, circumstances swayed to the extreme so unexpectedly, when you left? you know what, beats me. i'm clueless here too.
i missed you stupid cow, alot.

so i thought to myself how long my unspoken emotions would take to appear.
it is self indulgence.
just like hoho malvoliooooo.
don't be too alarmed. it's nothing, to me.
nothing.
i really hope so.
till you come back.. next year?
it came, and went. but i held on to those memories, they're stil with me (:

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HELLO CHELMIN, I MISS YOU AND GANG.

and my lovely split-personality-justinn-rachell-talented-fweird girlgirl!
thankyou for perking up my morning.
you entertained me loads! :) LOVES.

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